Ubuntu: 1337 114m4

“I spit in your general lowly direction!”

The 1337 114m4 (“leet” llama) is of above-average intelligence but is a socially-abrasive mammal that roams the lands surrounding the The Great Chasm. In an attempt to prove its 1337 (“elite”) status, the 1337 114m4 will disrupt any species that it considers to have a “lesser” ability to understand technical minutia.


The 1337 114m4 gets its name from the elitist behaviour that it displays around other animals. Despite appearing to be a social creature, the 1337 114m4 considers itself too good for lowly community efforts, especially when such efforts are face-to-face, or would bring an understanding of “secret knowledge” to the masses, or involve genuine social interaction.

114m4’s can be seen “uprooting” community garden plots (“Ubuntu Lands”) and shunning the simplicity and ease of such commons. Instead the 1337 114m4 insists on seed-bombing (compiling) the gardens with its own strains of crops (primarily kernels of bland cattle corn) for personal consumption, while claiming that Ubuntu Lands will never be “free enough” or cool enough. Any default set-ups or presentations of the Lands are to be reviled and spat upon in disgust. The lands must be totally stripped of all beautification details or style before the 114m4 will occupy them.

The 1337 114m4 is particularly fond of PGP key signing “parties”, not because it wants to establish identity, but because it has a need to prove a supreme-mathematics-demi-god status to those with smaller brains.

Guard Behaviour
1337 114m4’s are so protective of their “1337” status that they will often spit on any community creature that is working to bring projects of value to the masses. Other guard behaviour consists of intimidation tactics, such as reciting “114m4 mantra”, one-upping any tip or piece of advice, or simply chanting RTFM.




1337 114m4’s have been heading for extinction since the 1990s with the simplification of formerly arcane interfaces and systems. However, due to its irritating nature no one has developed plans to further catalogue or preserve this animal.


Co-conspirator: Randall Ross


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